How to Cope with Empty-Nest Syndrome – and how Vision boards can help so you wont be lost in Grief
It was a real physical wrench when your kids go off; many of us find it a very difficult time.
People say, "I can't wait for mine to leave," I probably even said it myself, "to have the house tidy and how I left it when I go out and then come back, of course your life will go on – but what was at the centre of your life isn't there anymore. You feel something is missing – it's real feeling of loss."
It's the end of a chapter. It's not changing everything: they still love you, you still love them. But the relationship will change – and there's the question of where it leaves you as a parent. The dynamics change forever. You could sit waiting for them to call, tracking their phone. Or you could do something different that you may not of thought of before.
This is where using imagery can help. People think vision boards are just for manifesting your future goals, but they can be used for so much more. In fact Vision boards are in fact deep rooted in to neuroscience.
Imagery primes the brain to see opportunities you didn't see before.
They offer a tangible way to process and manage new chapters in life, such as your child going off to university. By visually representing your hopes, dreams, and aspirations, vision boards can provide comfort and motivation during times of transition. They help rediscover and reconnect with who you are and the roles you take on. Is it now time to discover some of your long lost goals and inspirations of your own.
Don't worry if you don't know what they are ?
A vision board can be an invaluable tool for rediscovering yourself after your kids go off to university, especially if you're unsure about what you want.
Here's how it can help:
Let the Pictures Speak: Allow the images on your vision board to communicate with you. Choose photos or words that resonate with you, even if you're not sure why. Trust your intuition to guide your selection process.
Journaling Questions: Incorporate journaling prompts into your vision board process. Reflect on questions like What brings me joy? What am I passionate about? What dreams have I set aside? Use these prompts to explore your inner desires and aspirations. (You can try my freebie here - subscribepage.io/action-your-dreams)
Reconnect with Your Why: Use your vision board as a way to reconnect with your purpose and values. What matters most to you? What legacy do you want to leave behind? By aligning your vision board with your core values, you can gain clarity on what you truly want in life.
Take Time to Have Fun: Don't pressure yourself to have all the answers right away. Instead, approach your vision board with a sense of curiosity and playfulness. Allow yourself to experiment and explore different possibilities. Remember, it's okay not to have everything figured out immediately.
Listen to What Comes Up: Pay attention to any insights or feelings that arise as you create your vision board. Is there a particular image or word that elicits a strong emotional response? Listen to your intuition and use these insights to guide your journey of self-discovery.
Turning Hobbies into Income: If you find yourself drawn to certain hobbies or interests, consider how you could potentially turn them into sources of income. Your vision board can serve as a visual reminder of these passions and inspire you to take action towards pursuing them professionally.
Reignite Forgotten Hobbies: Your vision board can also help you reconnect with hobbies or activities that you may have set aside in the past. Use this opportunity to reignite your passion for these interests and make time for them in your life once again.
Overall, a vision board is a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal growth. By allowing yourself to play with images, journaling, and exploration, you can uncover new insights about yourself and gain clarity on the path forward after your kids go off to university.
The thing we all know inside is that we can't hold our children back. It is the fundamental paradox of parenthood: we bring them up with one ambition, which is to let them go. The better they leave, the more able they are to cut the strings and have fun, live well and enjoy their lives, the better we've done – but the bigger the loss, because the less they need us now.
I remember dropping my son off to uni only 10 miles up the road to leave him a house and say goodbye was so sad, but so right. This was how it was meant to be; it didn't matter it was 10 miles or 100 miles.
It can happen even if they don't go to University - think of the time when you drop them off at the airport at some unearthly hour for that first trip to join friends on a dubious-sounding beach holiday in the Med, and seeing them walk away from you at the security gates. They don't look back.
This is when we should look at it as a good sign, but it can still break your heart. In effect, we are making ourselves redundant from the most important, life-affirming and meaningful job we'll ever do: the job of raising the next generation of human beings.
Whether you are a parent with a busy schedule or a parent who has given up your career to care for your children, the fallout is the same.
Because children leaving home is a very big and poignant moment.
It is a culmination of so many feelings, all of them pretty crucial to what your life story is all about.
The overwhelming emotion, on the day you drop them off at university and the days and weeks that follow, is sheer sadness that they're not around anymore.
After all, you've got through the bad bits of adolescence; they've come through, and you've realised that you've got a pretty good kid after all.
He or she is funny, wise, friendly and caring – and, suddenly, gone.
If you would like some help in connecting with your vision or using some of my resources please get in touch. I experienced the empty nest, it’s real.
If you're struggling to connect with your vision or navigate the empty nest phase, I'm here to help. Whether you're looking to attend one of my workshops or prefer personalised support through 1-to-1 sessions, I have resources and tools available to assist you.
My workshops provide a supportive environment where you can explore your goals, aspirations, and values while creating your own vision board. Alternatively, if you prefer a more individualised approach, I offer personalised 1-to-1 sessions tailored to your specific needs and goals.
You can also take advantage of my resources, including vision board kits and planners, to aid you in your journey of self-discovery and goal-setting. These tools are designed to empower you to clarify your vision, set meaningful goals, and take actionable steps towards creating the life you desire.
If you're ready to take the next step towards reconnecting with your vision and embracing this new chapter of your life, please don't hesitate to reach out. I'm here to support you every step of the way.
